Depression showed me THE WAY.

 

Depression Showed Me THE WAY

 

Depression. Have you met anyone who has not suffered depression to some degree or another? I learned so much from depression. I’ve learned to seek out answers to the why. I know at times an answer may not come, at least not quickly enough. Help may seem out of reach.

I will never forget the sadness, emptiness, not wanting to be anywhere, do anything mood I experienced. It didn’t make sense. I had a wonderful husband who was a full-time student and worked small jobs to help out financially. We had our first daughter that year, and I was 30.

I didn’t want to kill myself, but I just wanted to disappear. I would go to work, come home, or go wherever I needed to, but I just didn’t want to exist. I worked full time, was a salaried pharmacist, made enough to pay the bills, but we did live paycheck to paycheck. We had a nice home and a wonderful neighbor who would take care of our daughter when my husband couldn’t take her to school or to work. She was left for about 10 hours a week.

My family did not live close, but we had a wonderful church family at the time. I knew I was depressed, and I’ll never forget opening a Christian magazine and the title of one of the articles was “Mental Illness in the Church”. I couldn’t believe it. It talked about how the church was not able to handle mental illness, and they don’t know what to do. They talked about how prevalent it was, but were silent. So what was I supposed to do?  I had a wonderful doctor who treated me for asthma and allergies, and he would pray with his patients. I didn’t even think about calling him.

About 2 months into this awful feeling, I felt I couldn’t take it anymore. I prayed, really opened my heart and asked God for an answer to WHY?  Our daughter was 8 months old now, and she knew when I left her. I worked 40 hours a week, and I’ll be honest, she bonded more with her father during this time. If anyone asked me to go anywhere or do anything, once she was born, I always declined if she could not come with me, as I felt like I didn’t have enough time with her. People realized this and would always say, “and you can bring Eden.” She was such a quiet, contented baby that my husband even took her to classes and group projects for school with him.

As I prayed, asking for WHY, I did get an answer. The answer was “You miss your baby, that is normal, and you want more time with her.” OKAY, yes, I know that, so what am I supposed to do? Trust, trust God, and go to work 4 days a week. What? But I’m salaried; Ed doesn’t bring in much money now. I use the calculator at the grocery store and cut coupons, how? How am I supposed to do this? AND we have 2 small car payments. Ed had the cutest blue Ford Ranger pickup truck, and when I would drive it, I remember people asking me if I was interested in selling it. Hmmm, shouldn’t have a problem selling it, I thought. All I knew was I wanted the way I was feeling to go away, and I would do what I needed to. I was quite a control freak back then. Thank you, Lord, how much you have changed me since then!

I knew I could do this IF I knew how much I would bring home working 4 days a week. I called human resources and explained I was a salaried pharmacist and wanted to know how much I would make if I worked 4 days a week. This woman told me she could not tell me that. I said okay, discussed with my manager going 4 days a week, and told him my reason was that I wanted to spend more time with my baby. He was a Christian, and he and his wife were pharmacists and had 3 children. He totally understood and said that would be fine. I still had no idea what my pay would be. I HAD to trust and make these changes, OR LIVE in the depressed state I was in. I told my husband what I needed to do, and he agreed to sell the truck, and then we would find something to get him through for a year or so as he finished school. God bless him for doing a paper route for a few months. He was out the door by 4 am EVERY morning and in bed by 7:30 pm, and had Eden, our daughter, on a great schedule. I would get home at 9 pm from the pharmacy and wake her up. This was too much for him, and I told him it’s enough doing school full time and taking care of our baby pretty much full time.

We advertised the truck, and it sold for the asking price before our next payment was due. I started to work 4 days a week, not knowing what my pay would be. Those 2 weeks were not filled with anxiety over what I would be getting paid. It gave me 3 days a week with my daughter, and I was so happy for the time I had with her. It was amazing how that additional day with her made all the difference. We found an old Cadillac for sale by owner, and we were able to buy it for Ed. It drove nicely and lasted the year.

My first paycheck, working 4 days a week, arrived. I opened it and it was FOR MORE THAN WHEN I WAS ON SALARY!! WHAT? I COULDN’T BELIEVE IT!

Apparently, I dropped a tax bracket, which allowed me to bring home more pay. I trusted God when I heard his voice. I could’ve given many excuses for why I couldn’t do what I did. I thanked God. I knew that the depression I was feeling was not what God intended for me. When I sought him for the answer, He gave one. I had to be open to the next step, and I had to trust him. I know God does not want his children living in a depressed state. We have so much to live for because of His love for us and because Jesus lives today. I think back over that time in my life (I was in my 30s) and how I tried to control that situation. I was originally willing to make changes if I could figure out the outcome. I think about that woman at human resources who told me she could not tell me what I needed to know. Reality is I didn’t need TO KNOW, I NEEDED TO TRUST.

Before this incident, I trusted God in tithing ( that’s for another chapter), and I believe He honored my faithfulness in that area.

I have, over the years, suffered some depression, and have learned to seek God FIRST, asking Him to show me the way. I have avoided medications, but do always ask God to show me what treatment, and or changes in my life I may need to make. I’ve learned to trust Him as I make changes that can be scary, but I know He never lets me down. This world and its ways can wear a person out. God and His way bring me life and a deep sense of joy that I could never get. Yes, I’m thankful when I start to slip into a depression, for I know it forces me to evaluate what God wants for me. What the enemy tried to use for bad, God turned it around for His good and my good! He will do the same for you!

 

Why would anyone call WISDOM foolishness?

 

Episode 23: Why would anyone call wisdom foolishness?

I want to tell you about a man named Paul. His given name was Saul but changed and you can read about it, I’ll leave the references for you in the show notes.

Paul was a very wise man in terms of his religious customs and laws. Here’s a little background on him. He was a Jew of all Jews, practicing the traditions and knew all the laws regarding his religion. He was going to defend those laws. To defend the Jewish religion, he knew he had to destroy anything that came against it.. Yep, Jesus, the Messiah, the one sent by God to redeem us once and for all, did not line up with the Jewish religion. Anyone following Jesus had to be quieted or put to death. He would proudly round up the followers of Jesus and send them to those responsible for killing them or putting them in prison. (1 Corinthians 15:9-11)

Some of us understand NOTHING stops God, and God revealed the truth of Jesus to Paul. After his awesome encounter with God, his name was changed to Paul from Saul. Paul may not have thought it was an awesome encounter as it was happening—He was struck blind. One thing for sure is that he recognized it was God with whom he had the encounter. You can read about it in Acts 9:1-19.

Just like Paul, there are truths from God’s word I may not quite understand or want to accept….and in teaching me, it may not be comfortable….I pray I don’t go blind. In day 17 of chapter 5 of the Jesusrx Prescription of life workbook it says

“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.” (Psalm 32:8)

God will instruct us, teach us, counsel us, and watch over us. He instructed Paul on exactly what to do and where to go and sent someone to help him and teach him. Do you doubt God will do the same for you? We do have a prescription on doubt in the JesusRx prescription for life workbook, and that prescription was covered on earlier podcasts that you may want to hear if you struggle with how God can work in your life.

The most important thing for Paul was to know the truth. I always think about the man sent to help him. Paul had a reputation among the followers of Jesus, and it wasn’t a good reputation. He was someone to fear and stay away from if you followed Jesus. I’ll just read this to you. The man's name was Ananias.

Then Ananias answered, “Lord I have heard from many about this man, how much harm he has done to Your saints in Jerusalem. And here he has authority from the chief priests to bind all who call on Your name.” But the Lord said to him, “Go for he is a chosen vessel of Mine to bear My name before Gentiles, kings and the children of Israel. For I will show him how many things he must suffer for My name’s sake.”

I’ll read you some words about wisdom from Paul. Remember, this is a man who denied who Jesus was and is now telling others that Jesus is the Christ, sent by God for them. He is telling others what Jesus's death means and the power of His resurrection.

The message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. He reminds those listening what was said to the unbelieving leaders of Jerusalem-

“I will destroy the wisdom of the wise and bring to nothing the understanding of the prudent.

Where is the wise? Where is the scribe? Where is the disputer of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of this world? For since, in the wisdom of God, the world through wisdom did not know God, it pleased God through the foolishness of the message preached to save those who believe. For Jews request a sign, and Greeks seek after wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified, to the Jews a stumbling block and the the Greeks foolishness, but to those who are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men. (1 Corinthians 1:18-25)

To the Jews, the message of Christ crucified signaled weakness, indicating Jesus was a false messiah. Jews looked instead for signs of the messiah's power; that’s why the message Christ crucified was a stumbling block

The unbelieving leaders of Jerusalem considered themselves wise. God’s judgment will expose all pretensions to human wisdom that is not anchored in Christ. (From NKJV notes on 1 Corinthians 1:18-19)

So just how are we to receive this Godly wisdom?

“But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God-and righteousness and sanctification and redemption----that, as it is written he who glories, let him glory in the Lord.”

LOOK AT THAT--- by the Fathers doing believers have an identification in Christ (Christ crucified) which allows us to possess the wisdom of God---Christ crucified the very essence of wisdom.

We not only have God’s wisdom—we also have His righteousness, which allows us to be sanctified to enter into His presence and ultimate redemption at God's court.

THIS IS POWERFUL—TO HAVE WISDOM, RIGHTEOUSNESS, SANCTIFICATION, AND REDEMPTION OF God all made possible by the crucifixion of Jesus.

I had no idea I would be talking about the crucifixion of Jesus this week. This coming Sunday easter will be celebrated. Christians will more than likely be in church and reflecting on the risen Savior. Some will only know about an easter bunny, coloring, and hiding eggs and easter candy.

Years ago, I was at one of the banks inside a Walmart, and a teller was telling another teller about the meaning of Easter to her. She mentioned Jesus rising from the grave. The other teller had no idea what Easter was about from a Christian perspective. I was a bit blown away, but it just goes to show you that some really have no idea about the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus or why it happened.

 

I think it is important to see that today God still works in revealing truth. Here is a story of another Jewish man named Dr. Bernard Nathanson.  I’ll just read parts of an article entitled Former Abortionist finds his epiphany in “Hand of God” . You can find the whole article at www.ewtn.com Catholicism . Reported by Julia Dulin The Washington times March 27, 1996. Bernard aborted a couple of his own children. You can read the article or hear episode 23 in the JesusRx prescription for life podcast. Thank God for the 1,200 Christians praying and singing outside an abortion clinic while surrounded by seemingly hostile news  media and police. This got Bernards attention as he went there to research a magazine article on the ethics of blockading clinics. He questioned “what indescribable force generated them to this activity”. 

If you listen to the podcast you will learn of one of Bernard's teachers that had converted to Christianity and never mentioned it to Bernard. It makes me think if the 75,000 abortions Bernard performed may have been prevented if Bernard had come to know Jesus. All those babies are in the presence of God. Even if the teacher had spoken up it may not have made a difference as Bernard may have not been ready to receive the Wisdom of the Cross. 

Are you ready to receive the Wisdom of The Cross? Have you received God's Wisdom to guide, lead and direct you? Those are questions only you can answer. 

 

Prescription for Wisdom: What is Wisdom Worth?

 

Episode 22: What is Wisdom Worth? Can you put a price on it?

For your listening enjoyment, go to JesusRx Prescription for life podcast.

Is wisdom something you can buy? I would say no. Can a person benefit from someone else's wisdom? Yes, of course! This is the beauty of wisdom applied. It benefits not only the wise person but also those around them. Of course, this does not happen all the time because wisdom is not always recognized or appreciated.  Have you ever heard, “The quiet words of the wise are more to be heeded than the shouts of a ruler of fools. Wisdom is better than weapons of war, but one sinner destroys much good” (Ecclesiastes 9:13-18)

We NEED wisdom in dealing with the world's problems. Heck, let's not even talk about the world's problems but the problems you may be facing in your own life right now. You may have so many things you are dealing with right now that you can’t believe I would even mention the “world's problems”. Perhaps what you are dealing with is a result of the world's problems. Let's talk for one second about the rising prices of food. We all need to eat; it can be very expensive to put healthy food on our tables. Eating healthy costs more than not eating healthy, or so we think. You will likely feel better and experience fewer doctor visits in the long run. So, how can I apply wisdom to these rising prices and continue to eat healthily? I would budget and watch sales and coupons. If it got to a point where I couldn’t pay bills, I would seek out a food giveaway place. I know that in the town I live in, several churches give out food. Some of it is healthy. I would utilize that for a time so the money I would spend on food could go towards my lights/heat, etc. Does that make sense? We do have a prescription for finance in the JesusRx Prescription for Life workbook, available on Amazon or at evapopek.com to check availability.

NEWS FLASH: AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER IN THIS LIFE WE ALL HAVE PROBLEMS; now, only if we all had the wisdom from heaven to deal with those problems. I mentioned in a previous podcast that God says to ask for wisdom if you need wisdom. If you are seeking wisdom to bring glory and wealth to yourself, you may be asking for the wrong motive. CAUTION: Having wisdom will not guarantee that someone will achieve wealth or glory on this side of heaven. It will bring things no amount of money can buy…peace and contentment.

Working and obtaining wealth is not bad. The Prescription for finances has helped me see that money and wealth are not bad. I know I still have some messed up thoughts about being wealthy as far as money is concerned. I hate the name it and claim it messages on money. I get sick of seeing all the ads about how to make money and emphasizing 6- and 7-figure incomes. Why is this? I will cover that in our Prescription for Finance episodes. You don’t have to wait for those episodes if you want to purchase the book and start the prescription now.

Let’s review what the wisdom from heaven is like: (James 3:17)

First, it’s pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy.

Before I ask the next question, I do want to say that God sent Jesus to die for ALL of us. He didn’t die for us because we are “good enough”. As Jesus said, “Why do you call me good? No one is good except God alone. (Mark 10:18) It is amazing to me that the perfect Jesus even knew His place before God the Father. My question is, do you think a wise person on this earth is due honor, is valuable and deserving and worthy? Like I said, in God’s eyes, we were all valuable enough for Him to send Jesus. You are useful in the sight of God. He cares for you and about you. He cares enough to offer you wisdom if you ask, but you will need to apply it.

To have wisdom is to know that God is worthy. This world holds wise people up and gives them honor, but do you know the foolishness of God ( which refers to the world's perception of the message preached) is wiser than human wisdom and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength? So, the next time you hear of how wise someone is, stop and consider that the “foolishness of God is yet wiser”. God is worthy and deserving of honor. (I Corinthians 1:25)

There’s a story of a Pearl of great price. (Matthew 13:45-46) There was a merchant who found a pearl and was willing to sell everything he had to obtain it. It is showing a wise person willing to sacrifice everything to gain what is most valuable…the kingdom of heaven. It teaches us to recognize and prioritize the incomparable worth of the Kingdom of God and to count the cost of our discipleship. It is wise to know the true value of something. Certain things are more valuable to one person than they are to another. An example would be marriage. Marriage is valuable to some and not to others. Some hold marriage as something very sacred and believe their marriage is worth much. The wisdom that comes from heaven in how to have a successful marriage will come into play. We have a Prescription for Marriage in the JesusRx Prescription for life workbook.

Job is described by God as a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil. Job was wise. He feared God. He knew the value of wisdom. He said

But where can wisdom be found? And where is the place of understanding? Man does not know its value, Nor is it found in the land of the living. The deep says, It is not in me, and the sea says, It is not with me. It cannot be purchased for gold, Nor can silver be weighed for its price. It cannot be valued in the gold of Ophir, in precious onyx or sapphire. Neither gold or crystal can equal it, Nor can it be exchanged for jewelry of fine gold. No mention shall be made of coral or quartz, For the price of wisdom is above rubies. The topaz of Ethiopia cannot equal it, Nor can it be valued in pure gold.

As I was reading this, something hit me. Again not where I was going to go. But I got to thinking about the pledge of allegiance. I substitute teach, and every morning at every school I go to, the pledge is said first thing and then a moment of silence. As I get into the upper grades, there may only be a couple of students who say the pledge. I wonder why? Are they too cool? Do they not know how lives were given in war to give them the freedom to go to school and get an education in the United States of America? We know it is not like this in some countries. The children have no schools in some countries or cannot get to one easily on a bus because there is no bus. I don’t know the reason the students don’t say the pledge. Maybe they don’t realize how valuable our freedom in the United States is and the sacrifices made for those freedoms. I think of wisdom and how we have been told to ask God for that wisdom. Isn’t he supposed to give us wisdom because we’ve asked? Do I totally understand and appreciate the wisdom of God? What if I am given that wisdom but don’t use it accordingly? Just as we have been given freedom in the United States, we don’t use it accordingly. What happens? A lot can happen when we misuse what we are given.

I want the wisdom given to me from heaven to increase the place it came from. There is no price we can put on wisdom; its value is far beyond our imagination. In the next episode, I will try to cover the Wisdom of God.

Wisdom is not just knowledge but a way of life.

Until next time, may you walk in the way of wisdom, being guided by our maker. Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for there is no walk, or device, or knowledge or wisdom in the grave where you are going. (Ecclesiastes 9:10)

 Get out your Bible, open it, read it, and apply it, and you will become wise beyond this world's understanding! God Bless!