Who Taught Us To Cry?
And why I cried at 1:15 am and 2:45
am
I was
thinking about all the emotions we have. Did anyone teach us those emotions?
Does anyone teach us to be happy or sad? At what point does a child know that
he’s crying because he’s sad, hurt, angry, or stressed about something?
I don’t
think any of our emotions are bad. I had a coach I worked with at one time, and
she asked me why I had to turn my sad into mad. I told her because I don’t like
being sad, so I decided it was better to be mad. After I said that, I realized
how ridiculous that was.
I guess,
like with any “medical condition,” we want to label it so we know how to treat
it. I was trying to fix my “emotional condition” by labeling it. Emotions are
funny. You can experience several at one time. It’s the same thing with medical
conditions. You can experience several illnesses at once, not realizing they
may stem from a single root cause you may not want to deal with.
Most
emotions I can feel rising up within me. There is that one called grief that
comes up without warning. I know I can take my thoughts captive when anger
arises and most times put out the flames of anger before it rages into an all-out
destruction zone.
Grief is not
the same. Of all the emotions I’ve experienced, that one I don’t try to fight
or hold back. Emotions can teach us so much about ourselves and where we are in
life. Is it really healthy to hold back any emotion? What do you think?
I know I
used to feel uncomfortable around people who cried. I would feel helpless and
didn’t want to cry in front of others, not because it made me look weak, but
because I didn’t want to make them uncomfortable.
There are
people we might call “criers.” They cry at the drop of a hat, and then there
are those who just won’t cry in front of others. There are those in between. I
started to write this because of the tears I shed in the middle of the night.
No one
around, except a snoring husband and a dog lovingly sleeping on my legs.
I used to be
such a good sleeper. I never understood people who couldn’t sleep through the
night. As I got older, I started to understand a bit better why some people
don’t sleep so well. It could be hormones, pain, sleep apnea, unhealthy living
conditions, work schedule changes, the list could go on.
Some get up
to go to the bathroom a couple of times; some let life's worries keep them up.
I truly
believe God will wake people up because He desires so much to talk to them. Do
you ever wake in the middle of the night and ask God what or who He wants to
talk to you about? Try it. You will be amazed at what happens.
Often, after
a conversation with God, He enables restful, peaceful sleep.
I want to
share my experience with you.
There are
times our hearts are so full. Full of so many things. So many emotions flood
our bodies. Good things happen to us every day. I believe that. I believe for
every negative thing something positive can be found. Maybe not in that exact
moment, but good can come.
I can spiral
down when I dwell on the negative things happening in my life and in the lives
of those I love. I cannot change people’s circumstances. I can change my
circumstances by moving forward, not by sitting in the past of my mistakes or
dwelling on what-ifs. Those what-ifs used to get me and hold me captive. NO
MORE does that happen.
I spent the
summer in New Hampshire, loving on my grandsons and daughter. I got to see
friends and share meals and laughter with them. I even met new people who
shared their stories of coming off medications and escaping a life of abuse. I
got to speak at a ladies' luncheon about the Prescription For Love.
My husband
and I thoroughly enjoyed the little country church we visited. Greenfield
Covenant is small, about 80 people, but wow, big on love and putting it into
action. They truly felt like family.
It was time
to pack the RV and head back to Nevada.
The first
night on the road, I woke at 1:15 am. The tears slowly started streaming down
my face. Why? Here’s the list.
I cried
because:
I was
missing my mom (she entered heaven on 11/4/2025). I knew that when I came back
from NH this time, she would not be there to share the stories, pictures, and
videos I took.
The day we
left was 9/11, the 25th anniversary of the horrible attack on our country. I
thought of that day and all the activities taking place in remembrance of the
loved ones lost and the evil that ensued that day.
I know my
dad misses Mom so much.
I was
leaving my grandsons and their mama.
I was
leaving friends that love me unconditionally
I was
leaving the love of a church family that we haven’t felt in a long time.
I thought
about situations where children aren’t in stable homes. They don’t have a
loving mother and father in their lives. The parents won’t raise them to know
God’s love because they aren’t receiving His love.
I thought
about the dogs I walked at the shelter who would not be there when I return.
Not because they were adopted, but because they were euthanized. I understand
the reasons, but it still hurts.
I miss my
younger daughter.
I thought
about my friends looking for steady employment and their health.
I thought
about all my “widow” (hate that word) friends and how much their lives have
changed. For some, it’s been years; for others, they’re just going through it.
I thought of
my friend who has “nodules” in her stomach. What are they? Will she be okay?
I thought of
all the changes life brings
So many
people are “stuck” and unable to live healthy, happy lives.
I started
talking to God about all this. All the transitions going on in so many people’s
lives. I know how hard we try to strive to make it in this world. It can be
exhausting to feel as if we will never rest.
I know that
when I choose Jesus, much of my striving ceases. Do I still have worries? Yep!
Just look at my list! That was just one day.
I look at
friends and family members who choose Jesus, and they don’t strive like my
friends who have chosen other ways, things, or people. There is a peaceful
confidence that shows up, no matter the circumstances. They know how strong the
God they serve is. They know He knows their struggles and still cares deeply
for them.
Joy comes
amid the chaos. Nothing seems to overtake them. Yes, they get tired, but they
don’t get angry or bitter at God.
I never said
problems will disappear, but many of them can and are avoided by trusting and
living the way God calls His people to live.
That is one
of the things that keeps waking me up. I ask God, Why? Why can’t people trust
you? He reminds me of the time I had a horrible time trusting churches and many
of the people who attended them.
Yes, Lord,
that is right, but I never stopped trusting You. The lessons I was taught were
so invaluable. I never stopped reading God’s Word, and the beautiful thing is
that I can always go to God, just as you can, and ask for revelation and truth.
If we seek
truth, we will find it.
As I lay
there that night, talking to God, He reminded me of Psalm 23. The Lord is my
Shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me
beside the still water. He restores my soul, leads me in paths of righteousness
for His Name's sake.
Psalm 23
continues to speak of comfort, goodness, and mercy that will follow me all the
days of my life, and the best part is that I will dwell in the house of the
Lord forever.
Soon,
comfort came, and, my mind set on what God says, I was overcome with joy and
assurance of His love for me and others.
Whether they
want to receive the Love God has for them through Jesus Christ is on them. Not
me. They must choose.
Soon I was
rejoicing that I have 2 grandsons. I never asked for them. God knew what I
needed. I do know children are a blessing from the Lord. Our family has been
blessed. I rejoice that I got to spend 3 months with them.
I go over
the Prescription for Children in the JesusRx Prescription for Life podcast, and
you can purchase any of the 12 Prescription for Life booklets at the Lulu.com
bookstore. The JesusRx Prescription for Life workbook, containing all 12
Prescriptions, is available on Amazon.
In missing
my mom, I was reminded of 1 Corinthians 2:9. I know her and other loved ones who
received Jesus are experiencing things God has prepared for them. Things we
can’t comprehend. Me, my dad, and my widow friends rejoice knowing there is no
sadness, pain, or heartache where our loved ones are.
Of course, everyone
grieves, and my widow friends go to God daily; He is called their husband. It’s
amazing how God can be ALL THINGS!
It takes a
repentant heart, a life looking to and living for God, and daily waiting on Him
to get us “home.” This place is not our home.
I thanked
God for the mom I was given.
I was
reminded of all those remembering 9/11 and how so many people came together to
help and bring comfort in such a time of need. How 25 years later people still
need the comfort of God, and He is there. Jesus left us the comforter, the Holy
Spirit. The Holy Spirit does more than bring comfort.
I was led to
pray for those caring for children who are not being cared for by their
parents. I was able to pray for situations as God reminded me of them.
Knowing He
is present- that’s the awesome thing about going to God in prayer; He will lead
you to pray for what you ought to talk to Him about.
I was so
thankful to God for answered prayer, providing a job for my daughter in the
field she studied. I then needed to believe, and I did, that he would work the
3 things that needed to happen to get her moved to the new state where her job
is. There’s still one more door that needs to open. I leave it with God and
know only through the Power of His Spirit things happen.
God is
gracious in answering our prayers, even when loved ones may not believe.
At 2:45 am,
I woke up remembering to pray for a friend who has “nodules” in her stomach. I
checked in on her a couple of days later, and she said they were benign.
Nothing to worry about. Praise God.
As we get
older, more medical issues arise. I have learned to go to the Great Physician
first, asking Him to lead me to any other physicians or treatments I might
need. Many times, no other treatment is needed, and I simply eat better, get
rest, read His word, and think upon the ways of God.
I began to
rejoice in my health and the health of friends.
Some people
hate change, some love it. I’ve had about 38 different jobs and moved about 14
times. This would lead some to say I like change.
I was able
to thank God for getting me through all the changes in my life. I am so blessed
and grateful that the person I married hasn’t changed.
Actually, my
husband and I have changed a lot since getting married. We’ve made many changes
together to keep us together and to grow together over the last 36 years.
I remember
that NOTHING stays the same on this earth, and it shouldn’t. We should be
growing wiser with each passing year. I thank God for the experiences I’ve had
that enable me to help others.
I talked to
God about technology and how I’m supposed to use it.
Talk about
change! Microwaves, computers, email, and cell phones weren’t even a thing when
I was growing up. We had to wait an hour for a frozen dinner or pizza to cook
in the oven. We used a phone attached to the wall. We learned to type on “non-electric”
typewriters. Buying stamps to send out paper invitations and keeping an address
book were a thing.
I still love
to get a card or “paper” invitation. Sending paper invitations was awesome and
still is to me. I LOVE PAPER, and I know God will get those who love him
through all the AI “stuff”.
I never want
to be a “stuck” person. You don’t have to be either. I love the question “Do
you want to be well?”
You would
think everyone would answer yes, but their actions seem to be saying something
else, as evidenced by the unhealthy ways they live and the negative thoughts
they continue to hold.
A selfish
person will never be well. A person living with regrets replaying past mistakes
will never be well. A person trying to live off the good they have done in the
past will never be well. I want to be whole as I work through all the changes
happening in and around me.
A person who
doesn’t feed their mind, body, and spirit with healthy things will always crave
“something.” Continue to feed your mind, body, and soul with the things that
will keep you growing and changing to make a difference while on this earth.
There is no
better way to live.
This saying
is so true:
“For as a
man thinks in his heart, so is he.”
What
thoughts are in your heart? Just as I had so many thoughts in my heart and head
that woke me at 1:15 am and 3:30 am, I knew where to take them.
If you need
help finding balance and comfort amid life's craziness, I can help.
You have to
want it. I will start by cheering you on, then teach you to be your own
cheerleader. People will always come and go. You are stuck with yourself. What
kind of person do you want to be?
All things
are possible with God. Are you ready for what is possible?
If so email
me at evapopekjesusrx@gmail.com for a free strategy session.
May you
sleep well, cry as often as needed, and know you are loved.
In balanced,
whole health,
Eva