“WHY IS THIS HAPPENING, YOU’RE SO FAITHFUL”
On a Tuesday afternoon, I talked briefly to my cousin Beckie. Actually I was venting to her about the For Sale by Owner House to her and how mad I was. I actually said some ungodly words in my rant. So far I had made 7 offers for a wonderful client I know the Lord brought to me. As I spoke to my cousin, I admit to being tired. I was heading into a Publix supermarket to service the Hallmark cards and Beckie was heading to the doctors so we would catch up later.
After my rant she says “I don’t know why all this if happening to you. You’re so faithful” (she says this after my mouth was spouting off ungodly words and attitude). She goes on to say “You have a testimony. You’ll have a testimony. I was also dealing with some strange health issues at the time.
I thought about her words. I have been praying about getting out of real estate. I applied for and continued to apply for drug rep sales positions. I know a dear sister in Christ had been praying for me for financial blessing, for peace, protection and for God’s favor.
I started to think about prayers and what I’ve been praying for. I had been praying for my client and for the house the Lord has for her. I admit I get frustrated and I know the Lord knows my heart and my attitude at all times. He waits for me to “calm down”, then wakes me at 5:30am (guess that’s when I finally calm down) and He speaks to me.
Tuesday morning, I hear in my spirit, “think about the prayers you’ve been praying and about what others are praying for you. Is it about pleasing your desires? Is it about making life easier for you? Are you trying to work it all out in your strength to accomplish success as YOU see it? “
I’m not angered or upset by these questions. I find comfort that the Lord would have me examine my heart. Now I need to be totally transparent with MYSELF. God already sees all of me, yes right through me.
I start to thank the Lord for where I am right now. I start to feel peace and joy knowing I’m HIS FOR ETERNITY. All the things I had been asking for are not bad things and God desires to give His children good things.
It’s the non-material things I really need to set my heart on and He WILL add every provision to that. BACK IT UP EVA, RELAX IN JESUS CHRIST. Don’t get angry about things that don’t matter. My life isn’t rough. BE REAL RIGHT NOW. I HAVE EVERY COMFORT I NEED. Lord I am asking, in Jesus Name to remove these allergies and fix my eyes, not just physically but spiritually fix them so they are set on you. Help me react as an allergy does to those things NOT of you.
Your ways can seem foreign until the end when I see the fulfillment of what you were doing in my life. When you fulfill what you have for me blessings abound in my life. Gods timing is always perfect. I say this as today is 7/3/20 and I am continuing my study in Luke. I am using the study guide called Engaging God’s Word-Luke. I am in chapter 18 and the title is “The Right Attitude” (pg190). The right attitude and the right spirit commentary, I believe answers my cousins question.
There are 2 things this chapter goes over. A persistent Widow, and a Pharisee who prays compared to a tax collector who prays. This is what it says:
The 1st parable teaches we must not give up but continue to pray in faith. The 2nd teaches that our prayers must always rest in God’s character, not in ourselves. God hears and answers our prayers NOT BECAUSE OF WHO WE ARE BUT BECAUSE OF WHO HE IS.
What is happening to me is not really about me, which then brings me to the next part of Chapter 18, which is having faith like a child as I come to my Father God.
It’s not wrong to pray about a job, it’s not wrong to ask for provision (God already promises that to His children.) I know I haven’t always been specific in my prayers and I’m learning to do that. Lord may you always give me that check in my spirit when it comes to serving myself. When my requests become more about my comfort and blessings than about service to you, please let me know! I want to be as the humble tax collector, able to rise and be justified by YOU, NOT BY ANY WORKS. May all my boasting be in what you have done and enable me to do IN JESUS.
Thank you, Lord, for your love daily in my life and the life of my family and friends. In Jesus Name I have all things!
With Abundance and Blessings,
Eva
(written 9/3/20 in Tyrone, GA)
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